Bringing Kids to PAX West?

PAX Prime istomorrow!  If you were lucky enough to get tickets, congratulations!  If you are thinking of bringing your kids, I’ve compiled some tips.  We’ve gone to almost every year, we’ve been parents for all of them, and we’ve often (but not always) brought our kids.

Paxwithkids
First of all, let me be clear:  PAX Isn’t for kids.   That’s not to say that you can’t or shouldn’t bring your kids, but it’s best to start out knowing that this isn’t necessarily a kid friendly environment.  There is a lot of swearing, a lot of adult video content and a fair amount of people who will not be happy to see your precious little snowflake.

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, my kids love PAX.  It’s every gamer kids dream come true, with demos, swag and gaming everywhere.  There is a ton of stuff to see and do, and if you go prepared, your whole family will have a great time.

Here’s what we’ve learned:

Leave the kids over 2 and under 6 at home, and know your kids.  I know this isn’t ideal, but I really think it’s the best advice I can give.  Nate is 16 and has been fine since about age 6, but at age 9, Kit it still only ready for a half a day. She has some sensory issues, is super easily distracted, and has no fear of getting lost. Now that she’s nine, I’m more confident that she can stay close and communicate if she gets lost or needs a break, but I’m still only comfortable to committing to four or five hours with her. I know that if we stay any longer we’ll both be miserable.

We brought Kit when she was a baby and again when she was a year and a half and it was fine. I carried her in an Ergo carrier and she slept when she needed to.  I brought her when she was two and a half and it was not fine.  She was simultaneously bored and over stimulated.  They don’t allow strollers on the main floor and she was too big to stick in a baby carrier for longer than 30 minutes at a time. Toddlers at a busy con just aren’t good times.

Stay Healthy. Several years ago our entire family got very, very ill right after PAX.  It was 2009, the year of the Great PAX Plague, and we had all contracted the Swine Flu.  Cons are germy places. Bring Hand sanitizer and use it often.  I’m not the biggest fan of hand sanitizer (and would recommend you use an alcohol based one as opposed toTriclosan), but cons are one place where they are appropriate.  I have recommended Bath and Body Works hand sanitizers before, and my friend The Geeky Hostess just reminded me that they make little rubber sanitizer holsters that you can loop onto your belt loop, purse, swag bag or baby carrier.  Let your kid pick their own scent, give them a little bottle of their own and make sure they use it often.  Remind them that it hasn’t worked until it has dried.   Bring disinfectant wipes.  Wipe the controllers, the keyboards, the mice, the tables, etc.  Most importantly: wash your hands as often as possible.  You need to wash them with warm water and keep the soap on your hands for as long as it takes to sing “Happy Birthday”.  Use a paper towel to turn off the faucet and open the door, there was a recent study that found that one third of men – and only slightly  less women – don’t wash their hands after using the bathroom.  Then they use their dirty hands to open the door, ewww!

Stay fed and hydrated.  Food is available in the convention center, and at restaurants around it, but the choices aren’t great and the waits are long. Hangry kids are no fun, especially when being chaperoned by equally hungry adults, so come prepared.  We bring Fruit roll-ups, trail mix, pre-packaged apple slices and cheese sticks in a little insulated bag. Be conscientious, eat in designated areas and bring foods that aren’t messy. Give each person in your party their own water bottle.  You’ll be on your feet all day and it’s easy to get dehydrated.  Refill your bottles often and drink up!

Bring a baby carrier.  If you have a kid little enough to tote around in a sling, Moby, Ergo or backpack carrier bring it.  Strollers are not allowed on the  floor of the main exhibition hall and toting a little one around in a carrier frees up your hands.

Bring a Camera.  There are tons of photo ops to be had, and tons of costumes from both the game companies and cosplayers, and there are tons of cool promotional displays to pose in front of.

Find the kids’ games.  The kid specific games may not be as plentiful as the adult-oriented stuff, but they are out there.  A few years ago the kids played a baby care simulator  and learned a Marvel-themed card game, Kitty rolled a giant D20 and won a prize, and both kids loved previewing a TMNT Wii game.  A lot of these games haven’t been released yet and the game creators are usually happy to get input from real children.

Take a lot of breaks.  The kids will tire faster than you do.  Sometimes being a good parent means that we have to pull ourselves away from all the fun and just go sit.  If you are staying at a hotel nearby, go back to your room for a nap.  Leave the convention center and go sit in the surrounding park.  If you have multi-day passes, go home early.  You don’t have to stay every hour all three days with a cranky kid.  Most years the kids only go for one day because it’s just too much, and one day is PLENTY for them.

Skip the panels.  While they’re interesting to you, your kid will probably be bored and cranky.  I’m a big proponent of NOT putting kids in situations that are bound to lead to what will appear to the average non-breeder as “misbehavior”.  Making your kid wait in a long line just so they can sit still and be quiet is a formula for disaster.

Tag-team.  If you are planning on bringing your kids the best thing I can tell you to bring is another able-bodied adult.  If you can switch off on child care duties you will have a better chance of getting to see a panel you really want to check out something more mature in nature.  This is how we are doing it this year.  I will accompany Nate in the mornings, while SD keeps an eye on Kit.  In the evening SD will accompany Nate and I’ll hang at home.

Make it easy to be found. Stick a business card in your kid’s pocket, or consider getting some Safety Tats.  Either option makes it easy for your kid to contact you if you get separated.  Staff members will be wearing distinctive T-shirts, make sure your kids know what they look like in case they need to find help. A reader suggested via the Parenting Geekly Facebookpage that parents wear a distinctive color to make it easier to find you in a sea of black T-shirts.

Be prepared to spend.  There is plenty to buy including games, pre-releases, shirts and toys and most kids will ask for at least something.  I suggest setting a spending limit before you leave home. We also have a policy of making the kids walk around all the merch tables before making their purchasing decisions.  There is so much cool stuff to buy if they buy the first thing that catches their eye, they are bound to find (and ask for) something else even cooler at the next booth.

Bring a Backpack (or a tote if you have a backpack carrier) and have the kids carry one too.  There is a lot of swag to be had, and if you don’t give the kids a way to carry their own, you’ll be carrying two times the amount of junk around.

Most importantly, have fun!  This is a great opportunity for your kids to see what the gaming community is all about. Even during our more “challenging” years we have had a ton of fun, and the kids look forward to it.   Now to break the news that she’s not going to Kitty…

If you have any tips to add please share in the comments!

This year, I’ll be hanging out at the GeekGirlCon Booth in the Diversity Lounge on Saturday from 10-2 and will be around the con for the rest of the long weekend. Come say hi!

Can I Take My Kid to Ghostbusters? A Parents’ Guide

Ghostbusters 2016 Parent's Guide

The original 1984 Ghostbusters is one of my favorite movies of all time. So I was pretty excited to hear that an all-female reboot was happening, and I knew that I would be there opening night. Since both of my kids (Nate, 16 and Kitty, 9) loved the original we went as a family.

Kitty isn’t easily freaked out. She loves action and adventure movies and counts Terminator 2 as one of her favorites. She’s seen the original Ghostbusters on multiple occasions – this new Ghostbusters was too scary for her. Even teenager Nate found it to be a bit anxiety-provoking. Here’s why:

-The ghosts are different. While most of the 1984 ghosts were relatively cartoony and seemed to delight in malicious mischief, the 2016 ghosts were scary and wanted to kill.
– Special effects have come a long way in 32 years. While the practical effects in the original were cool, they have not aged well. That’s not super scary for a kid in 2016. While the ghosts in the new movie were made to match the feel of the original, they were scarier just because they looked more “realistic”
-There were a lot of jump scares. They were pretty easy to see coming, so we were able to brace ourselves, but there were a lot.
-We saw it in 3D. It made some of the gags pretty cool, but being in a dark theater with 3D made it that much more intense.

This movie is rated PG-13, and I think that’s a pretty good guideline. it’s not gory and the horror is definitely tempered by humor -but it will scare younger kids and even sensitive older ones. It’s unlikely that your kid is going to be traumatized by the movie; Kitty didn’t have nightmares and is planning on being a Ghostbuster for Halloween, but it made for some intense moments in the theater. I think that viewing it at home in the day on a smaller screen once it comes to home video is going to be much easier for many kids.

Some other things to look out for:

-There is some swearing (including damn, shit, and bitches)
-There a few sly references to the internet controversy surrounding rebooting the franchise with women.
-There is a character that is terribly stupid. It’s pretty funny, and none of it is mean, but he is really, really over-the-top stupid.

My review? I liked it. I wanted to love it, but I liked it. It seems to rely heavily on the ad-libbing of the stars, which made a lot of the jokes one-liners that could have been in any movie. That made it feel a little disjointed to me. It lacked the charm of the original, and I think much of that had to do with the huge level of fan-service cameos and in-jokes. I loved all of the actors in the film, Kate McKinnon really stole the show as the super-quirky Holtzmann, and Melissa McCarthy proved once again that she’s a great action-comedy star. I wish the whole team had been scientists, or they at least hadn’t thrown the immensely talented Leslie Jones into the same role that Ernie Hudson filled as “blue-collar minority who joins the team for some reason”. Some of the fan service stuff was totally hokey and took me out of the film, but some of the gags were appreciated. I loved seeing a team of women Ghostbusters, and I was so excited that Kit got to see it, too – though I wished I would have waited to show her at home.

Can I Take My 5 Year Old to Finding Dory? A Parent’s Guide

DoryFinding Dory is the much anticipated sequel to 2003’s Finding Nemo.  This time around instead of a parent searching for their child, we have an (adult) child – Dory, the sidekick Blue Tang from Finding Nemo – searching for her parents.Dory Title

There isn’t much that’s objectionable in this film. There are no bad words, and no one is especially mean.  There are some daring escapes, and moments of peril, but they are resolved quickly and without too much scariness.  One scene that may be hard for viewers is a first-person shot of Dory as she is trying to make her way somewhere and gets lost when she forgets the directions. It was gut-wrenching, though it’s resolved quickly and rather triumphantly.

Like most Pixar films, you can expect some very emotional moments. Through a series of flashbacks, we see that Dory has dealt with her memory loss from a young age. We see the fear her parents experience as they wonder how their child will navigate in the world without them. As the parent of a special needs child, there were some moments that hit so close to home, it felt like the wind was knocked out of me. The filmmakers handled this sensitive subject with tact and care. While Dory’s disability is rightly a huge part of her story, it’s not the only part. She is surrounded by people who love her and care for her because of her optimism and ingenuity.  It’s a refreshing take on people/fish with  cognitive differences.
Kids of all ages will enjoy Finding Dory, which opens June 17th.

 

For a behind the scenes look at the making of Finding Dory, check out the Parenting Geekly interview with Supervising Animator Michael Stocker here.